lohaanda:

my kids: dad what’s for supper?
me: ooh hunny i am serving looks tonight
kids: we haven’t eaten in 3 days

glisteningangels:

in the future when historians talk about this election:

cleromancy:

a cat: *touches me with its small hand*
me: *eyes tearing up* thank you

sluttyshakespeare:

who fucking litters. why do i ever see litter. who thinks that’s okay. who. who NEEDS to throw their fast food bag out the fucking window instead of waiting until they get somewhere with a trashcan. what kinda clown behavior. get fucked.

vijara:

look: the right people will get it. the right people will see you and appreciate you for the person that you are. the right people won’t require you to dilute, censor, or edit yourself in order to be worthy of their time and affection. you don’t need to waste your time on people who are committed to misunderstanding you 

verifascinating:

topshoprockstar:

pizzaforpresident:

i hate when people call their grandparents weird names instead of grandma and grandpa like babooshka or salami

tbh i read this as “i hate it when (children of) immigrants refer to their grandparents in their native language”

yup

whosthisbitch:

me: well at least my self esteem cant get any lower

self esteem: